As a therapist who has worked in many diverse clinical settings, and a committed Christian, I feel the need to address one dynamic in particular: the issue of stigma to mental health is a barrier for many people, particularly those in Christian circles. Being armed with the right information is one way to break down barriers to treatment and healing.
As Christians, we rely on the Bible as our first reference in making major decisions. I hope to dispel some misconceptions around therapy, not only as a clinician, but also as a seminary-trained thinker.*
Misconception #1: As Christians, God is our only resource.
The belief that Christians should depend on God alone (and nothing or noone else) in times of need is an idea that I’ve seen block believers from seeking help. I believe it is a huge misconception. Jesus himself came to earth to redeem through relationship—by teaching and leading, but most importantly meeting the need of the individual through personal relationship. Jesus affirms the primary importance of our relationship with God and other people in the Great Commandment (Mark 12:30–31):
“And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength. The second is equally important: Love your neighbor as yourself. No other commandment is greater than these.”
On a side note, I wonder how often when we don’t hear from God, we believe he has gone silent? I propose that maybe he is silent because he has already given us the resources we need. These resources can be in the form of a friend, teacher, pastor, youth leader, therapist, or community resource.
I believe this is something God hardwired into humankind when he made man in his own image. God himself reflected on the creation of man and is quoted in Genesis as saying “it is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18).
Brene Brown, a well known author, professor, and researcher, shows how shame breeds in isolation. When we close ourselves off and isolate—at times even into our prayer lives—and don’t share our burdens with others, we are left stuck within ourselves. This is a breeding ground for all sorts of mental health problems like depression and anxiety, in addition to creating a need for coping strategies like avoidance (and escaping into our devices, for example) or methods of control such as substance or pornography consumption.
Yes, we need God. And we also need the other resources he’s given us—especially other people.
Misconception #2: Emotions are not part of God’s design.
This is another false belief that many Christians promote. In contrast, the shortest verse in the Bible shows a very real, emotive savior: “Jesus wept” (John 11:35). I could go on and on about how emotions are spoken to in the Bible, verses that address deep sadness, grief or loss, love, anxiety, anger, fear, confusion, doubt, and the list goes on. I could not possibly list them all here.
Apologist Dr. Ravi Zacharias proposes that God intended us to have emotions as a vehicle for worship. Dr. Sue Johnson, creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), shows how emotions serve as the vehicle of connection to our spouse or other close loved ones. If we put both of these concepts together, we see that at the very least emotions give us a means of stronger connection to God and to others. Notice how this directly relates to what Jesus said our greatest command was in life—to love God and others.
In contrast to the misconception, emotions are biblical, even godly, and necessary if we are to live the full lives of love God has called us to. Therefore, we need to learn to express and handle them well.
Misconception #3: Therapy is not good science.
This misguided belief is held by many. With the growing body of research across numerous fields, we are beginning to see something the Bible has referenced for thousands of years—the interplay of body, mind, and spirit. We see this concept depicted throughout scripture. Not only is God himself represented in three persons (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit), but as beings made in his image we see that there is more to us than just our earthly bodies. A part of us lives on after death. There is an internal part of us that lives even as our body deteriorates.
There is evidence that the mind affects the body, the body the spirit, and the spirit the mind. Brain science is finding that pathways can grow and reinforce certain behaviors, like addictions, and those same neuro-pathways can be rewritten. Through practicing new behaviors, we can actually change the gray matter of our brain, which is plastic and flexible! In attachment theory we see the reduction of experienced pain when in the presence of a loved one; one study shows how the perception of difficulty of a task is changed when we have a partner present.
Final Thoughts
Therapy is the act of getting to know oneself more deeply, and allowing a safe “other” in. This practice is essential in human connection and can be practiced in the safety of confidentiality and professional standards.
Remember, learning about something we are uncomfortable with can help us gain understanding. If you feel unsure about mental health, speak with people who have tried it and found success.
When something is painful, we avoid it; when we recognize that something is hard but necessary, we will be more willing to engage in the challenge. Allow yourself the grace to be challenged, and be open to asking for help.
*While much of the information I present here is anecdotal, there is also a large body of research that identifies the risks and benefits of therapy.
Neil is a therapist at a wilderness therapy program and professor of family therapy. He has spoken at numerous regional and national conferences, and is trained in couple and family therapy modalities. He has experience in Christian educational settings teaching, supervising, and as a licensed marriage and family therapist.